MARY SUES - Or, wtf mate

Let's start with a wee definition:

A Mary Sue (sometimes just Sue), in literary criticism and particularly in fanfiction, is a fictional character with overly idealized and hackneyed mannerisms, lacking noteworthy flaws, and primarily functioning as a wish-fulfillment fantasy for the author or reader. It is generally accepted as a character whose positive aspects overwhelm their other traits until they become one-dimensional. While the label "Mary Sue" itself originates from a parody of this type of character, most characters labelled "Mary Sues" by readers are not intended by authors as such. Male Mary Sues are often dubbed "Gary Stu", "Larry Stu", "Marty Stu", or similar names. 

While the term is generally limited to fan-created characters, and its most common usage today occurs within the fan fiction community or in reference to fan fiction, original characters in role-playing games or literary canon are also sometimes criticized as being "Mary Sues" or "canon Sues" if they dominate the spotlight or are too unrealistic or unlikely in other ways. One example of this criticism is Wesley Crusher from Star Trek: The Next Generation.

Granted, I got this from the Wikipedia entry about the item, but I feel it gets the general gist out there for those unfamiliar with the term. The media is chock-full of the demented sprog babies we call Sues, and under no circumstance should they be tolerated.

Why don't we like Mary Sues? Because they break all the laws of reality and realistic characters. They are generally mutant offspring of ideas that, apart, might have been okay but mashed together create an abomination. Ninja? Okay. Princess? All right. She-elf warrior? Sure. Embodiment of some kind of deity? Sure, we can give that a pass, too. But a ninja princess she-elf warrior embodiment of a deity? Fuck naw, son.

But before I go further, let me bring up something that can sometimes be confused as a Sue - the author insertion character. The difference between a Sue and AI is that the AI is generally not an extraordinary person. They are simply the creator's persona put into the story/RP scenario, whose points of view and morality hardly differ from said creator. Some new writers do this (Christopher Paolini's "Inheritance" series has the main protagonist as author insertion), because development of an intricate and interesting personality not their own is not easy. The creator could also be more comfortable reacting in a familiar vein to themselves, so they make a character akin to them. It's not a bad thing to do; it can serve as an easy way to introduce a newbie into RP, or allow a new writer to focus more on the story.

A Sue could even start as AI, and devolve from there into some malign creation from the Nine Hells. The best example of this that comes to mind is Anita Blake. Laurell K. Hamilton's series about the necromancer-vampire hunter begins innocuously enough; an author insertion character who encounters the strange and mythological. However, over the course of the novels Anita acquires more powers and dives headlong into pure Mary Suedom. Let's go over how she progresses, shall we?

She begins as a modestly-able necromancer, capable of summoning zombies through rituals. She's an excellent marksman, and has a black belt in Judo. Fairly typical individual here - she is not overpowered, and is, aside from the necromancy, a normal woman. By the most recent novel, she has acquired:

- Several marks from her vampire "master", which grant her superhuman strength, durability and healing powers
- A need to "feed" off the energies released during sex
- Several strains of lycanthropy, yet isn't a wereanimal herself
- The ability to call to several animals, including leopard, tiger and wolf
- The ability to control vampires, depending on age and ability
- A vampire servant nearly a millennia old, included in her own triumverate separate from the one she has with her first vampire
- Is considered the "queen" of the local wereleopard group, though she isn't one
- Can also "feed" off her "incredible anger"
- Used the ardeur succubus power to enslave a werelion
- Eventually defeats the progenitor of all vampire-kind

On top of all of this, the woman has like a dozen people she's fucking/ed, because people keep falling in love with her. If I had an award for the biggest Mary Sue in modern literature, I would personally hand it over to LKH. Admittedly, she'd be in the running with Stephenie Meyer's Bella and Charlaine Harris' Sookie. Maybe we can have a death-match between the three of them?

Did I mention she also fucked a swan king in bird form? Yeah. Swanfucker.

Now that you have an example of a Mary Sue, let's start a list of things that can help you identify whether you have inadvertently created a Mary Sue, or how to avoid them in roleplaying situations.

You May Have a Mary Sue If . . .

. . . the character possessed two or more unique traits (goddess demon, ninja princess elf)
. . . is of a race that cannot exist or a hybrid of wretched ratios (angel-demon, werewolf-dragon-vampire)
. . . has more benefits than flaws that makes them unrealistic
. . . has more than three college degrees and is in their early 20s (NO, YOU ARE NOT TONY STARK)
. . . has a handicap, that isn't actually a detriment to their daily life
. . . he or she has some flaw, but it's so minimal and superficial it compensates for naught (frivilous clumsiness comes to mind)
. . . the character is an expert in several martial arts that take years to master
. . . the character is *beautiful* and just everyone should know at all times
. . . he or she can down more alcohol than a rugby team, is a size 0, and feels no effects
. . . he or she is chased after by too many individuals of their preferred gender (and is not Tenchi Masaki)
. . . he or she is over-powered to the point of base comedy
. . . he or she must be important to practically everyone they meet
. . . the character has to be the center of attention in all social gatherings
. . . the character has the worst case of DiD(iD) you may ever see
. . . they are the last of/most important member of/only member of a group or race
. . . they are completely perfect in any way ("She never even farts!")
. . . the character has a SUPER IMPORTANT DESTINY they alone must fulfill
. . . he or she can win at whatever endeavor they engender, without assistance, and sometimes without getting a scratch on them or injury of any kind
. . . he or she has been granted divine powers from portfolios totally opposite of one another
. . . he or she has canon-character parents, who have never before had any kind of relationship, or comes from an impossible relationship, or is the secret child of a canon couple that was hidden away
. . . the character has hair/eye colors completely out of place and improbable for the race they're from
. . . the character talks about the aforementioned unique features at the drop of a hat, for no reason other than to point out how unique they are
. . . the character possesses some rare magical artifact/weapon that they alone can wield, that has no negative effects on their person
. . . the character is filthy, unbelievably, ungodly rich with no real reason, and without the benefit of a team of accountants or lawyers
. . . he or she possesses the rank or position within some organization (military, police, a business) with no prerequisite experience or training ("Our new CEO is only seventeen! And her hair is perfect, though the oddest shade of sea foam green . . .")

-- There are probably many more, but I decided to stop myself before I become even more of a hate-monger.

Do yourself the favor and skim over your character before you release it into the wild. Making a unique and interesting character is not a sin, but if there aren't any flaws to it, or nothing you can work on over the course of the story or roleplay, then what's the point in playing it? Perfect characters who can accomplish anything are dreadfully pedestrian and boring.

The best characters are flawed (Tony Stark's drinking problem, Gregory House's acerbic personality and drug abuse, Batman's insufferable bastardy, John Critchon's token human-ness, Aang's inherent pacifistic nature, Michael Westen's humanity), which allows people to form emotional attachments to them. You can't click with someone who has no flaws, doesn't screw up and never fails - life isn't that way, and seeing something/one like that automatically makes us detach from it. If there's no struggle for a character to overcome, no dramatic tension for a build-up, you will lose your audience and will have wasted your time.

Don't make a Mary Sue. Fanfictions are stuffed full of the things, and they occur enough in roleplay that you need a proverbial machete to cut through them all to find the diamonds in the rough. A Sue can be salvaged, but if they dwell in the oubliette of Mary Suedom for too long, there's nothing that can be done for them except pass them over to the Saints (as pictured above).

Oh, I'm wrong. We can mock the fuck out of them. They deserve it.